BENGAL BLUES: HOSPITAL

As I lay wired to a glucose bottle in the Intensive Care Unit, Sanctoria Hospital, West Bengal; my thoughts suddenly shifted to my blog. It occured to me that the blog's been left behind for too long a while and it would be unfair not to write about my adventurous life with a job @ Coal India Ltd; specially this one at the Hospital.

It was a normal day on 16 March, 2012 with usual hustle bustle in the office. My stomach was giving me ample trouble for past few days and hence I wasn't at my best. Summer was beginning to grin at me after a gruesome winter and the climate change was something my body never went through.

I walked hither tither with files and forms to realise that I couldnt balance myself anymore, not to mention the stacks of files. I sat down to give some clarification to somebody who came to office and found out that I was feeling giddy (past experience helps). My blood pressure was indeed going low.

The next moment I like to recollect is the one in front of the doctor. He reassuringly said, " Baito baito...aap ko kuch nahi hoga"..I sat down, but didnt know where to keep my head. He looked into my eyes and asked, " Aap kahan se ho?", "Kerala"; and the usual response followed, "BAAP RE !! ". The amused gathering of locals around him (not in queue u see, they just flock around) gazed at us in silence and did not complain for my quick and unjust entry.

He went on with some other queries related to my place, educational background, current place of stay, health troubles etc and with lots of fatherly affection, retorted, " Yeh koi jagah he rahne kaa? mein toh apni beti ko Coal India mein kabhi nahi bejtha..". My defences of an officer broke down. Tears gently touched my cheeks.... "Dont worry..You are in safe hands", his words calmed me down.

ICU welcomed me with all warmth not because I required "Intensive" Care, but because I was alone and did not possess a bystander so as to be admitted to a general ward or a cabin. I sighed in relief.

After I found a place inside, the nurse got hold of my left hand and began searching for the vein. I was surprised because my veins were always visible on my hands. But she found them "too thin" and finally settled for a compromise. The needle pierced my blood vessel but mission failure !! I was left with a punched left palm and the nurse religiously took possession of the right hand. While complaining that my hands were too thin, she tapped and tapped my right hand to find a reliable vein and was dissappointed. Finally another compromise but this time 'Operation Needle' was a success.

I could see a needle being pierced into the glucose bottle as well, to enable the trapped air to escape. I just hoped all these needles were absolutely safe. As the saline solution cooled down my blood stream, I thought to myself, that out of all places on earth, I had to be in a remote village in West Bengal, that too all alone, to celebrate my first ever admission to a hospital. Well!! Thats Life !! I got it now. :( :)

My neighbour uncle and aunt lent all support during this time and I would have been a happy patient if I didnt have to lie to my mom who sensed something wrong and kept on calling me incessantly. I ate food with a spoon in left hand and now, I learnt that too ! :)

Now, the next problem! I want to got to loo and wants myself to be unwired..On return from loo (God!! no water!) my blood clots and the hangama that ensued to reinstate my "wiring" made me jump in pain and prompted me to think that I should stay wired till the end even if that means my bladder will burst !! As I howled in pain, somebody caressed my forehead saying " Bacchi ladki"..and I din't like that !! :(

The night that followed wasn't very pleasant with some old uncles coughing and growling in pain nearby. But I had learnt the tactics to sleep well amidst noise, thanks to the foxes and all other God forbidden animals whose cacaphony prevailed at nights in this place.

The morning dawned and the fourth bottle was on. I watched the drops drip down the tube and lay quiet till I was hungry. I munched biscuits without brushing my teeth and talked to aayas, who dropped in to know my haalchaal. " Kemonachhii?? "; I replied in Hindi, "mein teek hu" and smiled. "Bari kothhaaii? . (God damn question !! Every time I answer I feel bad that I am awaaaay !! ) " Kerala"; I replied. "ohh..bhalo door aachi...tumi byah hoynaa?? "; "NAHI", I replied. They expressed their sympathy and went away.

I had my breakfast, gulped the yuck tablets and accepted the advise of a Keralite nurse(Gosh!! u can find them anywhere!! #proud ) to have proper diet. Doctor came in and discharged me. I called up auto chacha and went home accompanied by a benevolent lady staff of my office. Yeah! I had a good time.

After 2 days rest I will be back to that the same sleepy office, with smelly toilets, old computers, noisy dot matrix printers!!, and dark cigarette smelling corridors (exquisitely designed to generate a feel of the coal mine tunnels you see..) . Good luck to myself !!